The Roots (Continued...)

If it wasn't bad enough physically being an obese child, the mental and emotional tolls gave the experience multiple dimensions. You can probably guess some of these things that happened over and over: being picked last or not at all when choosing teams at whatever sport or game, taunting from other kids with no concept of tolerance or empathy, always being the fat kid in the class (once I heard a classmate say he was relieved because he thought he was going to be the fat kid, then he saw me...nice...).

Then there were the excuses and cover-ups from my parents and family members. Shopping for school clothes was never fun. I was called "husky", "heavy-set", "big-boned", and whatever other "polite" word could be used to describe me. A brainless child I was not. I knew who and what I was and couldn't get anyone to understand that or help me. People just thought I was too serious for my age and that I'd get over it. Still, there was a spark within me that said someday I can get out of this mess. Some people's somedays come later than others; thank God mine finally came along! Some people's somedays are today, no?

About the only thing going for me was the will to be a good student. Not a genius or a prodigy by any means, I knew that I had more than reasonable intelligence and did well in school, particularly in math. Apparently, I wasn't too fat for others to try to copy from me in class or expect me to answer all the teacher's questions. In this I had some advantage and used it to make life a bit more tolerable.

There were escapes during this time, as well. My brother took me to countless Oakland A's baseball games. My other brother took me to a lot of movies and often times gave me rides on the back of his latest motorcycle. That was always the best times! Once in a while, my brother would pick me up from school on his chopper. At least that day, I was the coolest kid in school! Family vacations and summertime breaks from school helped. Christmas time was kind of exciting, too. Lots of Hot Wheels and other toys and games to unwrap. Mom and Dad were kind and generous to me, they just didn't realize my inner turmoil.

Halfway between the ages of 10 and 11, my sister gave birth to her son. She was 18 and already out of control. It's a little late in the story to reveal this, but my parents were deaf mutes raising a large family of hearing and speaking children. Well, my sister took the most advantage of this fact and just ran wild. I was home most of the time, so sis decided to make me permanent babysitter. Here I was a child changing diapers, feeding and caring for a newborn while good ol' sis partied it up like tomorrow was judgement day. You name it, she did it. Shooting up, turning tricks, shoplifting, stealing from friends, family, whoever she could victimize. Meanwhile, she kept telling me how Junior was MY responsibility while she was gone. It was my fault when he got diaper rash or a little bump or scrape. When he got a fever, apparently it was me who neglected to keep him warm enough.

When she was around, I was appointed as her slave and she would mock me about it in front of her "friends". Lots of laughs. This is why I say that I was a father at age 10. I practically raised a child from birth for 2 years that I'll never get back. My other siblings were grown and out of the house, so I received little help from them as they were preoccupied with their own lives. Mom and Dad were deep in middle-age and really couldn't help me much. This evil spawn actually pulled a knife on our mother right in front of me (years later she would pull one on me), would constantly make threats, and tell us directly that yes, she was crazy. Tell you what, Nancy Reagan was right, just say no to drugs.

Well, times were traumatic to say the least. How to alleviate the stress of a mostly miserable childhood? The wonderland of junk food, of course! I was an intelligent child, but still a child. There is a big difference between intelligence and wisdom. How wise can a constantly sheltered, introverted, 12 year old be?

Take it from a much wiser 51 year old, make a change right now! Eat healthy and clean, move around, LIVE your life!

Next stop, the teen years...

At my worst, dressed raggedly most of the time.



Early in the transition with a dear friend





Making strides with help from a friend.



As the training continued, I learned to chop up my mission into  multiple short-term goals. For instance, starting at 532 lbs. meant that I had to change that first digit from 5 to 4, 4 to 3, and ultimately 3 to 2. It was absolutely brilliant to arrive at each of these checkpoints!

Obviously, I couldn't expect to be trained for free 5 days a week forever. My trainer had to change up the schedule from time to time and eventually, we had to drop to 4 days a week. Still, way more than I could ask for!

This was when I was shown the different free classes the gym had to offer. Once a week, I participated in water aerobics. Exercising in the pool did wonders for my flexibility and was a great change of pace. I noticed the Spin (stationary bike) classes that went on Tuesdays and Thursdays. When I was fit enough, I began taking the classes 10 minutes at a time. After a while, I could do the entire Spin workout. Little by little, I became a water aerobics and spin class regular. You couldn't get rid of me. In addition, my workout options were expanded and I was learning and doing more than I ever dreamed of!

As progress was made, I noticed an astonishing thing. People were beginning to take notice of me. More and more people would pat me on the back, shake my hand, tell me how well I was doing. Complete strangers were encouraging me and giving me positive reinforcement! You just don't know what that meant to me after decades of ridicule and negativity. After nearly 2 years, it seemed that hundreds of people were watching and cheering me on. I made a lot of friends and acquaintences, but I still get stopped from time to time by someone I don't know and they'll tell me how they remember me from when I started. Nice!

I'll wrap it here by telling you that the encouragement I got from these nice folks was as vital a factor in my progress as anything else. It carried me at times when I had doubts. As you make progress and achieve success, YOU will have the same effect. You'll be encouraged and admired and this will keep you going. Let me be the first aboard your band wagon!                               

         



Can't seem to rotate the pic, but you get the point!